... The day it was 113 degrees in Arlington
... First stitches
... getting so sunburned from the pool I still have scars
... blowing up doughnuts with blackcats
... the padded cell
... stepping on the end of a burning nylon rope barefoot
... dandelions
... brad newland and swingsets
... wishing I had never lied and hit my stomach
... Crystal Canyon
... Nearly shooting out Jordans eye with a bottle rocket
... Police Helicopters and running harder than I had ever had uphill to Brendans
... Halloween and taking in TRASHBAGS full of candy
... The night I snuck into Michael's bedroom window so we could play video games and hiding underneath the bed when his mom came in and knowing I WAS GOING TO DIE.
... stealing chromies from the neighborhood cars
... Showing Brian G. my pocket knife and then telling him not to tell anyone and he thought it was a threat and made it out into a deal that I pulled a knife on him and nearly killed him
... That very terrible night I walked to Woodland West Park and because of drugs I couldnt find my way home.
... Smoking in the Auditorium at AHS
... The Catwalks at AHS
... The glazed fear that Charlotte was killed the moment the 1500 lbs arbor came crashing down on the stage and then driving her and Mrs Martin to Arlington Memorial.
... Teresa (i'm still plucking out my eyeballs)
... Doing speed at IHOP on abrams in the bathroom and then going to a band competition and didn't know that Beth had overdosed and nearly lost her life.
... Drumline
... The Drumline room
... sleeping through drumline class with the whole drumline playing
... The rainy day at SixFlags that I wish never had happened.
... Theatre Arlington - some good some bad
... Feeling the magic of Dance Theatre at AHS
... stealing curtain call for dance theatre
... Breaking up with Charlotte on graduation night
... The senior prom tequilla shot party in my garage till 7 am
... The senior party of 98 at my house and the teachers and Mr Adams finding out and giving me the eye during graduation rehersal.
... Signing up for All state Jazz because I loved jazz but when I found out that Mr. Rogers who made me hate music was going to be my judge I didn't show up and went home to make a statement that music was to be loved and not hated
... New Orleans during college - oivey
... Running through the halls of a monastery that we were staying at in the French Quarter and getting into MASSIVE trouble for going down a 300 year old flight of stairs that was condemned and luckily not having it fall apart
... The amazing conversation with one of the guys from the monastery who was smoking a pipe and myself a ciggy in one of the courtyards one morning
... Scaring the crap out of my band director and not letting him leave the monastery until he talked to me and apologized for yelling at me.
... the brutal long 14.5 hour flight from DFW overseas
... the look of fear when landing in Beijing for the first time when I looked across the way at Angela.
... NEARLY being caught
... being followed
... climbing through an ancient battlement not usually seen area of the Great Wall that had been untouched since it was built and not apart of the tourist area.
... The van breaking down in the mountains north of Beijing and the incredible rain that fell
... 5am sneaking off by myself into the muslim quarter to eat at the noodle shop each morning and the lady looking in my bowl and bringing me ladelfulls of meatballs

... Not smoking in china
... Finding the girl of my dreams was not the real deal
... driving late at night
... without headlights
... knowing when i got past Ranger Hill in eastland county that I was finally away from everything
... screaming at roadsigns

... the most unsurpassable incredible sunset near Tarzan Texas
... El Capitian
... The peak
... McKittrick Canyon
... BIG bend all of it
... Breaking the glass in jasons kitchen and climing in to get jason
... Skinny dipping and scaring the crap out of BETH!!!! HA HAAHAHHHAHAH
... Cleburne State Park - glowing bodyparts - I still think it was funny
... 5:30 am watching the sunrise in west texas while having my hands in ice cold sand dunes
... my first mountain
... driving 54 north from Van Horn to the guadalupes and seeing El Capitian from 40 miles away
... carlsbad mexican food
... waking up with ice on the inside of the tent
... radios breaking because it was so cold
... Mount Elbert
... Independence pass with Stephanie
... seeing all the fall colors with steph
... trying not to think about sex and fall asleep in the same bed with Steph
... my 21st birthday and buffalo sweat
... swimming across the rio grande
... being shot at by the Federalies
... having the pleasure of years later taking my mother to Big Bend and hiking the window with her - and the unknown future of whether or not we had much time left together
... Millipeedes
... Whistler - all of it... the entire trip
... feeling really bad for explosive diarheaa
... PEMBERTON
... FLYING OUT OF PEMBERTON
... ORCAS
... getting drunk at a pub and walking home and spinning around in circles going downhill

... How old i felt when Jordan got engaged
... being trapped in my own house in Fort Worth because of roomates
... The sweater in east texas during the fog and that amazing conversation and longing for it to be always
... Andre in china - *giggle* And helping him when he got really sick
... That amazing incredible feeling I got bunjee jumping
... saying the word 'CUNT' so many times in 72 hours while traveling it no longer is a word
... laughing so hard I couldn't see straight
... the pain and agony of loosing Rocky
... the bouquet of flowers in my room in Oklahoma that made me cry
... seeing my grandfather with cancer
... seeing my grandfather without cancer later
... that mind grinding exhausting day I lost it in the garage and the simple words that followed...
... picking up the rock at the base of mount elbert and making a business out of it.
... the smell of oil in west texas
... the fear of the FAA contacting us after releasing some 10,000 balloons at a funeral right into the flighpath of DFW
... the next morning waking up after having tried to commit suicide
... burning all my old notes and writings
... the day I finally let go

... the smell of Cisco's head (my cat)
... the last day Doc lived and holding him in my hands when he finally gave out
... the girl who would hit on me every time I went to dublin, tx to get dr pepper
... The amazing 5 hour conversation at Starbucks when on jury duty with 3 completely different men. I came away from that conversation with an amazing perspective and incredible understanding.

...The painting that was given to me by a troubled teen because I believed in him


There is more... give me time...